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Anymore out there.

Discussion in 'The Lambda Locale' started by Torontojayjay, May 8, 2011.

  1. Torontojayjay

    Torontojayjay Active Member

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    Where are you guys. Guests, if come across this forum please register and say hello.
  2. chbolero

    chbolero Member

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    Hey there - I'm here :) I live in Boston. Having an interesting time with my testing right now. At 3 months post exposure, iGG tests came back negative. On medhelp, they said I am negative, but I'm not sure as they did an iGM test and that was equivocal. Not sure if I can just go 'woohoo' or not...

    How are you?
  3. Torontojayjay

    Torontojayjay Active Member

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    Hi. Nice to meet you. I haven't even had a blood test. I had blisters in my lip and was visually diagnosed. Not good!! Although I guess cold sores are quite common. Still hate it though.
  4. NYVqueergal

    NYVqueergal Member

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    same bought as you, chbolero, except i dont know how long its been since first exposure. could be 1 month, could be several. either way, im playing the waiting game too--waiting for blood work to prove my OB was what my doctor thinks - genital HPV, but 1 or 2? won't know that either for a few months.

    good luck
    Boogie123 likes this.
  5. MLIO

    MLIO Member

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    Hey. I´m here too. Live in TO. Just found out last week, but not sure when I was exposed. Not that it matters, but I would kind of like to know... and from whom.... Boooo....
  6. LINYGuy66

    LINYGuy66 Newbie

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    I'm here too....live on Long Island...seems very hard to find gay people with HSV. Would like to hear stories. The "straight" folks have been helpful, but would love to hear from other gay people and what they've experienced.
  7. Alex389

    Alex389 Newbie

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    Hey there,

    Just signed up for this and Im hoping more gay men and women come to share their experiences. :)
  8. LINYGuy66

    LINYGuy66 Newbie

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    Hey there

    Would love to know what others are experiencing...seems some
    Say HSV is not that big of a deal and others think it's
    Horrifying. I'm somewhere in the middle. What do others think?
  9. maddie04

    maddie04 Newbie

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    hi. Well ive had it for a month now..at first i was horrified..and in alot of pain. I am doing good with suppresants, lysine w/vitamins and support from this site. My only issue is Im scared to death to have the discussion with anyone that I am dating.. This is the most horrifing to me..I can accept that I have it, but telling someone and having them judge me is another thing..I printed out the statistics on hsv and the chance of spreading it..its very low under certain circumstances...but u should still disclose to your partner... I guess my feelings are mixed right now..
  10. compteach

    compteach Newbie

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    [QUOTE=LINYGuy66;255840I'm experiencing the same feelings, fear of telling my kids father about this because he told me that my ex-husband had children by too many other women to feel safe with him. He was so right, but i dismissed his warnings over and over.
  11. Alextoronto

    Alextoronto Newbie

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    hello All, I am in Toronto and going to the phoenix meetup in April. :D. Say hello. I just got my first outbreak :( last week.
  12. Ol Pokey

    Ol Pokey Newbie

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    Hello! I'm a 26 yo gay man in Portland, OR. I have no advice as far as disclosure yet, I'm still waiting on results really. But I really think if before I had this OB someone would have told me before sex that was something they had but they are very safe about it, etc, I wouldn't have cared or juged them at all. I mean I think I might have taken it as a good sign, like, wow, this guy's obviously really truthful, that's commendable. I never had that happen so I don't know, but hey! I think so?!
  13. JCharmer

    JCharmer Newbie

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    LINYGuy66,
    I'm having similar feelings. Where are all the homos? I live in NYC, and have been on this site for a bit, but there just don't seem to be many guys standing up. I love me some straight support, but I would love to know more gay men who are in my boat. Or at least a boat close-by.
  14. At0miq

    At0miq Newbie

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    Hey everyone, 33 yo guy from Toronto just "freshly" diagnosed. Thinking about going to the orientation at the Phoenix Assoc too--anybody find much value in these meetings?

    It's hard enough dating in the gay community, I feel like this just makes things so much more complicated.
  15. Torontojayjay

    Torontojayjay Active Member

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    Hey man. The meetings are great; however, I kind of had the feeling that I was the only gay man there. They are very supportive and I would for sure recommend going to a meeting. I wouldn't worry about the dating thing at this point. Just concentrate on getting your body and mind healthy. Once you start feeling betting about yourself; which you will, your dating situation will improve. Also, allow yourself time to feel grief about your diagnosis. Its 'OK if you feel crappy and depressed. Just keep in mind that these feeling are only temporary and you really have no choice but to feel better in time.

    Most importantly understand that you are not alone!
  16. At0miq

    At0miq Newbie

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    Hey Alextoronto, I'm probably going to check that out too. I live midtown so it's really convenient--not like the usual Toronto thing where it's in the middle of freakin' nowhere. :p

    Thanks a lot Torontojayjay. I keep telling myself this is just another step in the road and I'll be stronger in the end. And like you said, dating can wait.
  17. memedance

    memedance No longer a member

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    I just want to say hi for now, and that I will try to post more later. I currently live in Australia, but in the past I have lived in other places (e.g. Toronto for several years.) I have been living with hsv2 for more than 20 years.

    LINYGuy66: I find it's kind of weird, and for me it fluctuates. When you are surrounded by accepting people, or people who think it's normal, it's a lot easier, but when you've just
    suffered a massive rejection, it's a lot harder.
  18. fleur

    fleur Member

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    hey everyone,
    glad to see other gay people sharing their experiences on here
  19. Acesheart

    Acesheart HC Support Provider

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    Hey fleur, welcome to our site. I am female and married to a non h man for many many years. I'm happy you found us. What is your h? I'm ghsv2, for 24 years now. I live a very normal life. Once again welcome and take care, hugs.. Truly, Ace :)
  20. LivingLA

    LivingLA Newbie

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    This is an interesting thread. I'm a 30's something gay man who lives in Los Angeles. Apparently about 1/3 of people in large metropolitan cities have HSV 2 and that that percentage may be at 50% or more in the gay population, but I have never heard anyone every talking about it, ever. Obviously, the concern is focused on HIV.

    I went to a clinic to get a culture test and the nurse said I didn't have herpes. He said I had syphilis, gave me some medication and sent me on my way. This is probably one reason why many gay men don't know they might actually have it. It wasn't until I got a blood test from another clinic that I tested positive for HSV 2 not syphilis.

    I went to a recent support group meeting and it was great to see faces versus avatars. I really felt less alone and isolated. It was great. But I met the one other gay guy and he said that no one from LGBT community ever attends these meetings. Since I was diagnosed less than a month ago, I'm not really interested in dating right now, but it might concern me in the future. Dating is hard enough in the gay community. Right now, it feels like it's going to get a lot more difficult.

    Also, since there is no data on the rates of transmission between same sex couples, what do you tell your potential partners about transmission? Do you use the male to female or the female to male rates of transmission? I know it's a 1 or 2% difference but that counts!

    They say it gets better with time and that it becomes nothing more than a inconvenience. Let's hope they're right.
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